26 August 2017, Melbourne, Australia
Joel Creasey is a comedian, speaking at rally for 'yes' campaign in advance of a marriage equality postal survey being conducted in Australia by the conservative government.
My boyfriend he proposed to me.
He proposed that we see other people ....
But in that moment I realised that I truly do want to get married. It is my basic human right, I know I am such a diva these days ...
Like food, shelter, marriage, what’s next, clean drinking water, I am out of control ...
I heard somebody say the other day that gay marriage affects all Australians, it affects ALL Asutralians
Incorrect. It only affects the two people in love wanting to get married.
The only people being affected by gay marriage today is the Fitness First around the corner, because they are empty while every gay man and lesbian is at this rally.
And while I’m at it, can I just say, no. We do not want to marry THE SYDNEY HARBOUR BRIDGE.
I had a one night stand with it once. It was terrible. Very needy, and stayed for breakfast.
Young people, of whom I am one, thank you Anthony, we need to get out to vote. We saw what happened only too recently in America, when people did not turn out to vote.
Jennifer Hudson was voted off seventh on the third season of American Idol.
I know it takes effort and young people and people of my generation and younger, we hate effort! I haven’t cooked a meal in three years. I won’t watch a youtube ad if there’s not a ‘skip ad’ option at the start of it. And I Ubered tothe gym the other day, and it’s in my building.
But this is one of those moments in our young lives that demands that effort.
Insta-story yourself voting if you must, trust me, it’s going to make great content.
But I’d like to speak directly now to those young people who might be struggling right now with their sexuality, made now only worse by this plebiscite, this amazing, non binding, postal plebiscite ... well it’s a survey really, probably done by the same people who do Family Feud.
Survey says - you screwed up Prime Minister.
And I’d particularly like to talk to those young people who are perhaps living in a smaller town, where being gay isn’t particularly common place. Let me assure you, it does get better.
And to please, stick in there, find an ally, find somebody you can talk to.
To the young people let me assure you, the best part of being an adult is youcan make your own decisions.
You don’t have to be friends with the bullies you share maths classes with.
You don’t have to talk to those family members who don’t accept you for who you are.
Christmas can just be you and a couple of hotties sipping Mai Thais in Hawaii if you want.
You don’t have to hang out with Uncle Peter who constantly asks, ‘when you decided to be gay’ .
The gay community is a family, and we are waiting for you, here in Melbourne, and in Sydney and in Adelaide and there’s three in Perth, we are waiting for you all around the world, waiting to embrace you, and tell you that you are loved, and important, and that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you.
And if I’m perfectly honest, when you get here, I’ll probably try to crack onto you on the dance floor of the Peel.
That said, we’re talking about small towns as well, if a footy club in the regional town of Hamilton Victoria can paint their fifty metre line rainbow, then anything is possible. And do not lose a skerrick of hope.
Now I know Seb said earlier not to speak directly to the No campaign, but I’m a comedian and I can’t help myself, so I’d just quickly like to talk to those people who printed the laughable ‘STOP THE FAGS’ posters. First of all, hello I’m on the television and I’m famous, so isn’t that exciting. Probably never spoken to one of those people before. And yes, I agree, smoking is revolting. And no I’m sorry, we are not going anywhere. That is not going to happen. We are going to fight. We are going to achieve marriage equality, we are going to be allowed to marry the person we love, regardless of gender and sexuality.
We are going to win, in SICKENINGNESSand in health.
And I’m finally going to be able to sell my ten page bridal spread to New Idea, like I’ve dreamt of all my life.
And finally, PS Stop the Fags, your graphic designer sucks, I’ve made more compelling posters on Microsoft Paint.
Thank you ladies and gentlemen,
Love is love.