Jon Stewart: 'I am not used to the cruelty', Senate blocking PACT Act - 2022

29 July 2022, Washington DC, USA

So ain't this a bitch? Ain't this a bitch?

America's heroes who fought in our wars outside sweating their asses off, with oxygen, battling all kinds of ailments while these motherfuckers sit in the air conditioning walled off from any of it.

They don't have to hear it. They don't have to see it. They don't have to understand that these are human beings.

Do you get it yet? Do we see that these are … these aren't heroes. These are men and women, mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers that we just let stand outside in the heat when they can't breathe.

I'm going to read you something. This is beautiful. I'm going to read you something beautiful. You know what... I said a curse word and I'm sorry about that. That was my fault. Let me say something beautiful.

There's a tweet from Senator Rick Scott of Florida from yesterday. It's beautiful. And I'm sorry about the cursing and let me say something beautiful to make it up to you.

"I was honoured to join the USO today and make care packages for our brave military members in gratitude ... In gratitude! ... of their sacrifice and service to our nation." And there's a beautiful picture. I wish you could see it. He's standing with a little package. Did you get the package? It's like, I think it has M&Ms in it and some cookies. And some moist towelettes.

Honestly. I don't even know what to say, I've been coming down here. 10, 15 years. I'm used to the hypocrisy. Christina Keen will tell you from DFW, she sat in an office with Mitch McConnell and a war veteran from Kentucky and he looked that man in the eyes and he said, 'We'll get it done'. And he lied to him cuz Mitch McConnell yesterday flipped.

I'm used to the lies. I'm used to the hypocrisy. Senator Pat Twomey won't take a meeting with the veterans groups, sends out his Chief of Staff. I'm used to the cowardice. I've been here a long time.

The Senate is where accountability goes to die. These people don't care. They're never losing their jobs. They're never losing their healthcare. Pat Twomey didn't lose his job. He's walking away. God knows what kind of pot of gold he's stepping into, to lobby this government to shit on more people.

I'm used to all of it, but I am not used to the cruelty.

They passed it June 16th. They passed the PACT Act 84 to 14. You don't even see those scores in the Senate anymore. They passed it. Every one of these individuals that has been fighting for years, standing on the shoulders of Vietnam veterans who have been fighting for years, standing on the shoulders of Persian Gulf War veterans fighting for years, Desert Storm veterans to just get the healthcare and benefits that they earned from their service. And I don't care if they were fighting for our freedom. I don't care if they were fighting for the flag. I don't care if they were fighting cuz they wanted to get out of a drug treatment centre or it was jail or the army. I don't give a shit. They lived up to their oath and yesterday they spit on it in abject cruelty.

These people thought they could finally breathe. You think their struggles end because the Pact Act passes. All it means is they don't have to decide between their cancer drugs and their house. Their struggle continues.

Crowd member: This bill does a lot more than just give us healthcare

Gives them healthcare, gives them benefits. Lets them live.

Crowd member: Keeps veterans from going homeless. Keeps veterans from becoming addicts. Keeps veterans from committing suicide.

Senator Twomey's not going to hear that cuz he won't sit down with this man cuz he is a fucking coward. You hear me? A coward. And like I say, I'm used to it. But this type of cruelty on those that we say we hold up as our most valued Americans. Then what are we? Pat Twomey stood up there ... 'Patriot Pat Twomey', Excuse me, I'm sorry. I want to give him his propers. I wanna make sure that I give him his propers ... 'Patriot Pat Twomey' stood on the floor and said, 'this is a slush fund. They're going to use 400 billion to spend on whatever they want.'

That's nonsense. I call bullshit. This isn't a slush fund. You know what's a slush fund. The OCO, the Overseas Contingency Operations fund. 60 billion. 70 billion dollars every year on top of 500 billion, 600 billion, 700 billion of a defence budget. That's a slush fund. Unaccountable, no guardrails. Did Pat Twomey stand up and say 'This is irresponsible. The guardrails?' No, not one of them did. They vote for it year after year after year. You don't support the troops. You support the war machine. That's all you care about.

Crowd member: He personally signed the doc proclamation to

Boy, they haven't, haven't met a war they won't sign up for and they haven't met a veteran they won't screw over. What the fuck are we?

Veteran: Barbaric! Barbaric.

And now they're going to go away. Pat Twomey says, 'I've got veterans groups behind me'. I call bullshit. These are the veterans groups. VFW, American Legion, IADA, Wounded Warriors, DAV, Amvets. They're all here.

This is the veterans community, Senator. They don't stand behind you. In fact, you won't let them stand in front of you.

Crowd member: Cowards.

Cowards all of them. Cowards all of them. And now they say, well, this'll get done, maybe after we get back from our summer recess, maybe during the lame duck because they're on Senate time. Do you understand? You live around here. Senate time is ridiculous ...

These motherfuckers live to 200. They're tortoises. They live forever and they never lose their jobs and they never lose their benefits and they never lose all those things. Well, they're not on senate time. They're on human time, cancer time.

Don't you have families? Don't you have people who are deciding how to live their last moments? I know some of them, they've been down here advocating with us. They spent their remaining time advocating so that other soldiers didn't have to face the indignities and the depravity and the desperation that they faced. And none of them will hear it. And none of them care except to tweet. Boy, they'll tweet it. Can't wait to see what they come up with on Veterans Day, on Memorial Day! Well, this is the reality of it.

I honestly don't even know what to say anymore. But we need your help because we're not leaving. These people cannot go away. I don't know if you know this. Obviously I'm not a military expert. I didn't serve in the military. But from what I understand, you're not allowed to just leave your post when the mission isn't completed. Apparently you take an oath, you swear an oath and you can't leave.

But these folks can leave cuz they're on Senate time.

Go ahead, go home, spend time with your families cuz these people can't do it anymore. So they can't leave until this gets done. Cuz these people will not give up, they will not give in and they will not relent.

This is an embarrassment to the Senate, to the country, to the founders and all that they profess to hold dear.

And if this is America first, then America is fucked.

Jon Stewart: "They responded in five seconds", 9-11 first responders, Address to Congress - 2019

11 June 2019, Washington DC, USA

I want to thank Mr. Collins and Mr. Nadler for putting this together, but as I sit here today, I can't help but think what an incredible metaphor this room is for the entire process, that getting healthcare and benefits for 9/11 first responders has come to. Behind me, a filled room of 9/11 first responders, and in front of me, a nearly empty Congress. Sick and dying, they brought themselves down here to speak to no one.

It's shameful, it's an embarrassment to the country, and it is a stain on this institution. You should be ashamed of yourselves for those that aren't here, but you won't be because accountability doesn't appear to be something that occurs in this chamber. We don't want to be here. Lou doesn't want to be here. None of these people want to be here, but they are, and they're not here for themselves.

They're here to continue fighting for what's right. Lou's going to go back for his 69th chemo. The great Ray Pfeifer would come down here his body riddled with cancer and pain, where he couldn't walk, and the disrespect shown to him and to the other lobbyists on this bill is utterly unacceptable. I would be so angry at the latest injustice that's done to these men and women, and another business card thrown our way, as a way of shooing us away, like children trick or treating, rather than the heroes that they are and will always be.

Ray would say, "Calm down Jonny, calm down, I got all the cards I need," and he would tap his pocket, where he kept the prayer cards for 343 firefighters.

The official FDNY response time for 9/11 was five seconds, five seconds. That's how long it took for FDNY, for NYPD, for Port Authority, for EMS to respond to an urgent need from the public, five seconds. Hundreds died in an instant. Thousands more poured in to continue to fight for their brothers and sisters.

The breathing problems started almost immediately, and they were told they weren't sick, they were crazy. Then as the illnesses got worse and things became more apparent, "Well, okay, you're sick, but it's not from the pile." Then when the science became irrefutable, "Okay, it's the pile, but this is a New York issue. I don't know if we have the money." And I'm sorry if I sound angry and undiplomatic, but I'm angry and you should be too, and they're all angry as well.

They have every justification to be that way. There's not a person here, there is not an empty chair on that stage that didn't tweet out ‘never forget the heroes of 9/11’, ‘never forget their bravery’, ‘never forget what they did', what they gave to this country’. Well, here they are, and where are they? It would be one thing if their callous indifference and rank hypocrisy were benign, but it's not. Your indifference costs these men and women their most valuable commodity, time.

It's one thing they're running out of.

This should be flipped, this hearing should be flipped. These men and women should be up on that stage, and Congress should be down here answering their questions as to why this is so damn hard and takes so damn long. And why no matter what they get, something's always pulled back and they got to come back.

Mr. Johnson, you made a point earlier, and it was one that we have heard over and over again in these halls, and I couldn't help but to answer to it, which was you said, "Look, you know, you guys are obviously heroes, and 9/11 was a big deal but you know, we have a lot of stuff here to do, and, you know, we got to make sure there's money for a variety of disasters, hurricanes and tornadoes."

But this wasn't a hurricane. This wasn't a tornado.

By the way, that's your job anyway. We can't fund these programs, you can.

Setting aside that no American in this country should face financial ruin because of a health issue. Certainly 9/11 first responders shouldn't have to decide whether to live or to have a place to live. The idea that you can only give them five more years of the VCF because you're not quite sure what's going to happen five years from now, well I can tell you, I'm pretty sure what's going to happen five years from now. More of these men and women are going to get sick, and they're going to die. And I am awfully tired of hearing that it's a 9/11 New York issue.

Al Qaeda didn't shout ‘death to Tribecca!’. They attacked America, and these men and women, and their response to it is what brought our country back, it's what gave a reeling nation a solid foundation to stand back upon, to remind us of why this country is great, of why this country is worth fighting for, and you are ignoring them.

You can end it tomorrow. Why this bill isn't unanimous consent and a standalone issue is beyond my comprehension, and I have yet to hear a reasonable explanation for why. It will get stuck in some transportation bill or some appropriations bill, and get sent over to the Senate, where a certain someone from the Senate will use it as a political football to get themselves maybe another new import tax on petroleum, because that's what happened to us in 2015.

We won't allow it to happen again.

Thank God for people like John, thank God for people like Ray Pfeifer, thank God for all of these people who will not let it happen.

They responded in five seconds. They did their jobs with courage, grace, tenacity, humility. 18 years later? Do yours. Thank you.

Jon Stewart: 'Bullshit is everywhere', final speech 'The Daily Show' - 2015

6 August 2015, New York City, NY, USA

 Australian and NZ playable Video. 

Bullshit is everywhere.

There is very little that you will encounter in life that has not been, in some way, infused with bullshit; not all of it bad. The general day-to-day organic free-range bullshit is often necessary, or, at the very least, innocuous: "Oh, what a beautiful baby! I'm sure it'll grow into that head!" That kind of bullshit, in many ways, provides important social contract fertilizer, which keeps people from making each other cry all day. But then, there's the more pernicious bullshit; the premediated, institutional bullshit designed to obscure and distract. Designed by whom? The bullshit-ocracy. It comes in three basic flavours:

1. Making bad things sound like good things. "Organic, all-natural cupcakes", because "Factory-made sugar oatmeal balls" doesn't sell. "Patriot Act", because "Are-you-scared-enough-to-let-me-look-at-all-your-phone-records? Act" doesn't sell. So, whenever something's been titled "Freedom, Family, Fairness and Health America", take a good, long sniff. Chances are it's been manufactured in a facility that may contain traces of bullshit.

2. Hiding the bad things under mountains of bullshit. Complexity. "You know, I would love to download Drizzy's latest Meek Mill diss, but I'm not really interested right now in reading Tolstoy's iTunes agreement. So, I'll just click "Agree", even if it grants Apple prima nocta with my spouse!" Here's another one: simply put, "Banks shouldn't be able to bet your pension money on red" Bullshitly put it's, "Hey, a handful of billionaires can't buy our elections, right? Of course not. They can only pour unlimited, anonymous cash into a 501(c)4 if 50% is devoted to Issue Education, otherwise they'd have to 501(c)6 it, or funnel it openly through a non-campaign coordinating Super PAC, with a quarter- I think they're asleep now, we can sneak out!"

And finally, the bullshit of infinite possibility. These bullshitters cover their unwillingness to act under the guise of unending inquiry. "We can't do anything, because we don't yet know everything." "We cannot take action on climate change until everyone in the world agrees gay marriage vaccines won't case our children to marry goats who are gonna come for our guns"

But the good news is this: bullshitters have gotten pretty lazy, and their work is easily detected, and looking for it is kind of a pleasant way to pass the time, like an I spy of bullshit. So I say to you tonight, friends, the best defence against bullshit is vigilance. So, if you smell something, say something.