Joel Creasey: 'My first date Harry Styles cancelled tonight', GQ Comedian of the Year - 2018

15 November 2018, GQ Awards, Sydney, Australia

Thank you so much. I'm so thrilled to be the first award tonight so that I can drink. There are so many handsome men here tonight. I feel like a bogan at a Nickelback concert. Or a lesbian at Bunnings. My first date Harry Styles cancelled tonight - he says restraining order. So I'm here with my dad as my date. …

When I was fifteen I stormed into the kitchen and told my parents I was gay. Sorry ladies! And they said cool, we're having pasta for dinner. And I said, you didn't hear me, I said I'm gay - I can't eat carbs!

Will Ferrell: 'When I do too much coke I cry', GQ Comedian of the Year Award, 2015

 8 September, 2015, Royal Opera House, London

Thank you, I, ah, I’m ah, I feel, ah, [hits lectern], I feel a little emotional actually, um, partly because of this award,  and, ah, I was afraid my speech would be too slow, ah, because of Samuel’s warning, that I did a little bit of cocaine in the bathroom, and ah, and ah, [inhales] so, [its lectern] and so when I do too much coke I cry, and um, [breaking down] and so I want to thank Dylan, thank you [sobbing]. You’ve been like a father to me [sobs] We’ve had so many good times together, the time we buried that dead body and we said we’d never talk about it [sobs] David Gandy I want to examine you for testicular cancer. You are a dreamboat. You my friend, wow! Wow! I am not going to stop looking at you. Ron Wood, my new best friend Ron Wood [over amped fist pump]. Jose Mourinho ... [Spanish accent] Jose Mourinho .. keep playing defence, man, keep playing seven guys in the box. I love it. I love it. [Deep breaths] My heart’s racing! I don’t want to die tonight, I don’t wanna die! Anyway thank you GQ ... GQ ... [waking off] ... thank you.