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For Emma and Mark: 'Mark is clearly a man of vision … occasionally blurred, sometimes double", by Alan Cooper - 2013

October 27, 2023

15 November 2013, Adelaide, Australia

Hello.

As father of the bride on behalf of the Emma’s mother, Jan, the groom Mark’s mother, Jeanette and her husband, Rob and the grooms father, Mark, I extend a warm welcome to all the relatives and friends who have joined us to celebrate this occasion.

I know that many of you have travelled long distances to be here. Thank you all for coming to help celebrate this very special day. Although it evokes a touch of sadness, I cannot let this moment pass without mentioning those loved ones who cannot be with us. Special mention should be made of Mark’s grandmother who died earlier this week. How they all would have loved to be part of today's celebration. Wherever they are, I'm sure our absent friends and family will be looking down on us and are very pleased and happy for Emma and Mark Please be upstanding and raise your glasses in a toast ……….to absent friends and family……

Today, I look at my daughter and I see an intelligent, independent, attractive, elegant, stunning young woman…. she obviously takes after her mother. The child that was a non stop chatterbox has grown into a beautiful, sensitive and caring woman.

Whilst preparing this speech I reflected on Emma’s childhood. From the day of her birth with her doting brother and sister Marcus and Sarah so keen to see their new sister that Marcus ran onto Anzac Highway and got hit by a passing car, resulting in a broken leg and about 6 weeks in ½ body plaster cast. It was a hell of a start.

Walking and holding intelligent conversations at 10 months of age, Emma has been in a hurry all her life.

Except for getting to school on time.

The 500 metre walk to OLSH school was always left to last minute resulting in Emma’s home group teachers total frustration.

When in Yr 9 walking home from school one afternoon, Emma clicked into her other love - her love of animals. In the bushes next to the intersection of Main North Rd and Regency Rd, she came upon a small black bundle of fur covered in vomit and blood. Today, about 14 years later, Henry’s old and deaf but still enthusiastically greets visitors into the yard today.

At 16 with a drivers licence in her hand, my car was no longer mine. I astounded me how often Emma needed to drive to school. At least it was more difficult to find stray animals.

I am really fortunate that my Emma has met her Mr. Right. Of course, marriage isn’t just about finding the perfect partner, but also about being one. Emma has made such a success of her life and career so far, that I’m sure her marriage to Mark will be just as successful. I must admit that I am the proudest dad in the world to have accompanied Emma today. I think that you will all agree that she looked stunning. Every Dad hopes his daughter will find a reliable, sensible, and considerate partner and as much as you try not to interfere in their lives, you always hope your children will make the right choices in life. Emma chose Mark.

Mark, we are delighted to welcome you into our family. Any man who is prepared to gut his house…. literally, …and then proceed to rebuild it personally with new timber floors… polished, new ceilings…painted, new kitchen..fitted etc.. only months before his wedding has demonstrated his commitment. or does he just need to be committed. Has the paint dried yet Mark?

Even so, when you see how stunning Emma looks today, it proves one thing I’ve come to know about Mark– he is clearly a man of vision … occasionally blurred, sometimes double, but nonetheless a man of vision who’s been lucky enough to find my daughter. Plus when I saw he had a passion for motorbikes that earned him points in my book. So it’s a pleasure, Mark to formally welcome you into our family.

So onto the next part of the speech……offer bits of advice Mainly for Mark really:

I suppose that after 32 years of marriage I ought to be able to manage something a bit constructive. Mark just remember these 3 words …all, only and just. You will hear them many times. Such as all you need to do is, it only costs this much and it will just take 5 minutes. These are all gross understatements but as a great philosopher or was it a comedian said,”women are to be loved and not understood”.

Mind you, helping around the house is not a bad idea. I believe from the crime statistics that there has never been a case of a wife shooting her husband while he was doing the washing up. When you are wrong admit it, whenever you’re right…just shut up! There is no challenge in a marriage that can’t be overcome by one or more of the following: I was wrong! You were right! And ….yes dear I love You!

And finally remember: Marriage will teach you many things — loyalty self restraint…obedience. Jan says that I’m in the remedial class . Well we come to the last of my duties and that’s giving the toast to the bride and groom … Ladies and gentlemen, we have a radiant bride. We have a charming and handsome groom. If you could charge your glasses and be upstanding. Emma put out your hand and Mark take hold of it…..now Mark remember this moment because trust me it will be the last time that you ever have the upper hand [or Married 3 hours and Emma already has the upper hand]

May they be blessed with happiness that grows and with love that lasts. We wish them enjoyment for today, the fulfilment of all their hopes and dreams for tomorrow and love and happiness always. To the bride and groom…..Emma and Mark

Enjoyed this speech? Speakola is a labour of love and I’d be very grateful if you would share, tweet or like it. Thank you.

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In FATHER OF THE BRIDE Tags FATHER OF THE BRIDE, ADVICE, WELCOME, TOAST, ALAN COOPER
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Luke: 'He has taught my children to snorkel', for Hamish and Isabelle - 2013

August 5, 2015

7.15pm INTRODUCTION AND HOUSEKEEPING

For those of you who - unlike all of my uncles – have shown some restraint and held off on getting started on the charcuterie, please feel free to hop in. You are meant to begin.

I think now is an opportune moment to give you an overview of the proceedings is evening:  in brief, until about 9pm we will be eating with some speeches between courses and then, after a cutting of the cake and what I am sure will be an incredible bridal waltz display from Hamish (and Isabelle), there is going to be dancing and drinks until 11 when the liquor license expires.  That’s the very short version of how this evening is going to run.   It would surprise none of you to learn that Isabelle and Hamish have actually planned everything to a much higher level of detail than that, and if any of you would like to understand any aspect to the minutest level please see me and I can walk you through the multiple spreadsheets (version 1 through to 6), programs and timetables generated over the past 6 months. You may need to be a certified project manager to understand it all.

Anyway, I see from the timetable that I am already 27 seconds over time, and the next item is a very important one.  If you would all please stand.  Ladies and Gentlemen, please join me in welcoming the bride and groom……

[Isabelle and Hamish enter]

7.20pm SPEECHES

Our first speech this evening comes from Claire.  Claire and her husband, Jim, became very close friends with Hamish and Isabelle when they moved to Sydney about 5 years ago.   Claire also worked at XXXX with Isabelle.    I think it is a testament to the strength of the friendship that developed between them that, when Jim and Claire eloped to get married a few years ago, they asked Hamish and Isabelle along as their sole witnesses.  I think eloping is tremendously romantic.  It did occur to me however that some people elope because they can’t bear the idea of having to do wedding speeches.  I do very much hope Claire isn’t one of those people.

7.55pm (after entrée) SPEECHES - BEST MAN

Our next speaker this evening is Harry, Hamish’ brother.  Harry is speaking in his capacity both as best man and on behalf of Hamish’ family.  So he’s doubly special. 

Like Hamish, Isabelle and my brothers and my Dad, Harry is a hockey player – though I must say that among males in my family that really just involves intermittent appearances in the “mean streets” of the lowest grade suburban hockey while for Harry and [GRROM] it meant state representative teams and national indoor sides.

Harry also shares the characteristic of some Smith males – and I’m thinking about both my brothers – of not being quite so concerned or worried about organisation as the bride and groom. I wasn’t able to attend the bux day last weekend but was delighted to learn that – despite arranging the day – Harry managed to be an hour late. And to go to the wrong venue.  I think that this is good news for Isabelle and Hamish though - in my limited experience, shared frustrations about your broader family is one of the secret keys to a healthy relationship – nothing promotes more communication like a common complaint - so I’m delighted that Isabelle and Hamish  have years of complaining their pedantic hearts out to each other to look forward to. 

Anyway, without further ado, the very best man, Harry…. 

8.30pm (after mains)  SPEECHES - PARENTS OF THE BRIDE

The next speakers are my parents, Chris and Peter.

I know that sometimes parents have reservations about the people that their children choose to marry.  I can assure you that is not the case with Hamish.  My father in fact was so keen to bring Hamish into our family fold that – more than 15 years ago – he actually paid a young teenage Hamish to give him one-on-one hockey lessons at Hawthorn hockey ground.  At least I think he paid him for the hockey lessons – perhaps it was an early dowry.  Mum and Dad are very, very happy with Hamish.

As many of you know, Isabelle is, by a number of years, the youngest in the Smith family. Dad often corrects the misconception that she was a late mistake by telling people that she was his only planned child.  I think that because she was a fair bit younger than the rest of us, Isabelle developed a very special bond with Mum and Dad when she was little.   And, on a serious note, I know that this is a very emotional and happy day from Mum and Dad.  But I’ll hand over to them now…

8.40pm SPEECHES - BRIDE AND GROOM

So, we come to the final speeches, the bride and groom.  I won’t delay too much but I do want to want to say just add couple of things about these two. 

The first is that it feels a little odd to be welcoming Hamish into our family as he’s been an important part of it for quite a while now.  You heard from Freya earlier about how much he and Isabelle are part of the lives of my children and those of my nieces and nephew.  He has taught my children to snorkel, to juggle and even from the earliest days he has thrown himself into family celebrations:  when he and Isabelle had just started seeing each other he came dressed to a fairy-themed 4th birthday party as an extremely convincing green elf and  - only two nights ago - he was at our house helping stain and burn the edges of birthday invitations to a Harry Potter themed 10th birthday party. 

And I think this shows that, despite high successful, busy people, Isabelle and Hamish share a wonderful ability to throw out all the pressure and stresses of day to day living and focus on the really important things in life: their relationship with each other and the people they love.  I am enormously proud of my little sister’s kindness, compassion and capacity to love.  I’m delighted that she has found in Hamish such a wonderful friend and partner.  I wish them all the best in their lives together.

Anyway, nothing more from me.  Ladies and gentlemen….the bride and groom.

9.00pm                 Cutting of the cake and bridal waltz

10.45pm               Announce license expires at 11pm / last drinks/ Isabelle and Hamish leaving shortly

11.15pm               Announce bus departure

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In MC Tags MC, BROTHER, SISTER, TIMETABLE, INTRODUCTIONS, WELCOME
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