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Julian Schiller: "Laughter is the closest distance", for Tony and Kate - 2003

August 18, 2015

15 March, 2003, Melbourne, Australia

I’m going to start off by taking you back to where this all began. It was a Sunday afternoon in 1991 when Tony took that fateful step, picked up the phone, called e-harmony and gave out his credit card details.

Kate and Tony first met at a pub in Fitzroy called the Rainbow Hotel. It was at a  meeting for the Melbourne University Film-making club, of which they were both members. Soon after they went on a date which had  good aspects and bad aspects. It was bad because Tony spent most of the evening bitching about an ex-girlfriend with whom he had recently separated. It was good however because this prevented him from mentioning military aircraft for the entiriety of the evening. 

It’s quite poetic that Tony and Kate met in the film club because that experience, in many ways, changed their lives. Making short Super 8 films inspired them both to seek careers in the creative arts. Kate was later accepted into VCA to study film-making, and Tony began to perform comedy spots on 3RRR.  So you could say, that on that Sunday afternoon in the Rainbow Hotel, Tony and Kate, without actually knowing it, discovered what they wanted to do with their lives and who they wanted to share it with. Which in itself, is quite remarkable.

But then again, Tony and Kate’s relationship is quite remarkable. They’ve known each other for 12 years, and, at times been more on and off than Mick Jagger’s undies, but the connection they shared never dimmed. Those who knew them always prayed this day would come, where both of them would realise what was obvious to everyone, that from that day in 1991, they always had been, and aways would be, deeply in love.

Let me quickly say something about Tony. I have worked with this mad Irishman for over ten years writing and performing comedy, which in itself is a high pressure job, especially when, like us, you’re not actually funny. Having got to know Tony well over this time, can I just say he’s a kind and generous lover....no I’d just like to say Tony is one of the most centered, most moral, most supportive, and most loyal people I have ever met. Tony loves, values and respects the most important people in life, his family, his friends, and now, most of all his new bride Kate.

Once early on in our careers, Tony missed the 21st birthday of his brother Joe due to a meeting with Channel Ten in Sydney. Tony was deeply upset after this and vowed never again to put his the needs of his family and friends second to anything  And to this day, 10 years later, I’ve never known him to do so.

I was trying to think of a phrase to sum up Tony and Kate’s relationship, and the one that instantly sprang to mind was “laughter and love”. Tony and Kate are always laughing. Whether they’re teasing each other, or joking about the days events, or photographing each other naked in police custody, they love a good laugh. Victor Borges said ‘Laughter is the closest distance between two people’. Tony and Kate are proof of that. Tony and Kate are so natural around each other, because they enjoy each other’s differences and laugh at them. And if they decide to breed, with all that laughter and love I can think of no better environment for a child to be born into. If that offspring dislikes airplanes however, I can think of no worse environment for a child to be born into.

I also wanted to say something about love, since this occassion is basically a ceremony which celebrates the love in it’s most pure form. And as love is a slightly mystical and magical force, I think it’s always best summed up by poetry, so I’d like to read you a poem by E.E. Cummings.....

There once was a man from Nantucket....


i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
                                                      i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
 

 

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In BEST MAN Tags BEST MAN, FRIEND, COMEDY
← Matt O'Boyle: 'He saw her in Supermacs one cold night' song for brother Sean & Caroline - 2015Ruth: 'May you always feel as close as you do this day', for Karla and Simon - 2009 →

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