Jimmy Kimmel: 'The President is completely unhinged', Monologue to Trump supporters - 2017

16 August 2017, Hollywood, California, USA

I want to apologize in advance, because we had so much fun stuff planned for you tonight. We worked on it all day, we had Bachelor in Paradise, kids going back to school, there was a horrible new pair of Uggs we were gonna discuss—I even thought, “Hey, maybe we won’t talk about Donald Trump much tonight.” And then he opened his mouth and all manner of stupid came out. And I’m not joking when I say I would feel more comfortable if Cersei Lannister was running the country at this point.

This press conference today, I don’t know if you saw this, I know a lot of you are here on vacation. It started—it was supposed to be a conference about infrastructure, and it ended with our president making an angry and passionate defense of white supremacists. It was like if your book club meeting turned into a cockfight—it really was remarkable. I don’t know who decided it would be a good idea to send him out there to talk to reporters today, but whoever did obviously misread his state of mind and the mood in this country right now.

The president—I feel like I can say this with reasonable certainty—the president is completely unhinged. The wheels are off the wagon and hurtling towards the moon right now. I have some clips to show you, and before I do, I want to say, clips are one thing—they’re edited down, we choose them for content, but if you get a chance, go online and watch the whole press conference from beginning to end, it’s astonishing. The only thing I can compare it to is, remember when Mike Tyson bit Evander Holyfield’s ear off? And then he bit his other ear off? This was the presidential equivalent of that. Trump wasn’t even scheduled to take questions today. He was supposed to give a brief update on an executive order he signed to boost infrastructure, but reporters wanted to ask about his weak response to what happened in Charlottesville, and things went infra-struckin’ nuts from there.

Trump: Honestly, if the press were not fake, and if it was honest, the press would have said what I said was very nice, but unlike you and unlike—excuse me—unlike you and unlike the media, before I make a statement, I like to know the facts.

That’s right. He’s very careful about that. Like the fact that Ted Cruz’s father killed JFK and Obama was born in Kenya—he’s a stickler for the facts. OK, so when they got to his statement about putting the blame for the murder and the hate crimes in Charlottesville on “many sides,” not just the Nazis and Klan members—a statement he tried to soften yesterday by specifically denouncing those groups—not only did he go back to his original statement, he doubled down and actually defended their actions:

Trump: When you say the alt-right, define alt-right to me, you define it, go ahead.

Reporter: Well, I’m saying, as Senator—

Trump: No, define it for me, come on, let’s go, define it for me.

Reporter: Senator McCain defined them as the same groups behind—

Trump: Ok, what about the alt-left that came charging in—excuse me—what about the alt-left that came charging at the, as you say, the alt-right. Do they have any semblance of guilt? What—let me ask you this—what about the fact that they came charging, with clubs in their hands, swinging clubs, do they have any problem? I think they do.

I think we do. I think we might need an alt-president right now.

Trump: I will tell you something. I watched this very closely, much more closely than you people watched it, and you have, you had a group on one side that was bad, and you had a group on the other side that was also very violent. And nobody wants to say that, but I’ll say it right now.

Don’t say it right now, don’t ever. So he put blame on both sides, but he also had kind words for both sides:

Reporters: Neo-Nazis started this thing. They showed up in Charlottesville to protest—

Trump: Excuse me. Excuse me. They didn’t put themselves down as—and you had some very bad people in that group. But you also had people that were very fine people on both sides.

“Very fine people on both sides.” Let’s look at some of the very fine people on the Trump side there. This is from the rally on Friday:

Marchers: Jews will not replace us!

Yeah. So here’s the thing. If you’re with a group of people and they’re chanting things like “Jews will not replace us,” and you don’t immediately leave that group, you are not a “very fine person.” And by the way, today, David Duke, who is a very fine former Grand Wizard of the KKK tweeted, “Thank you, President Trump for your honesty and courage to tell the truth about #Charlottesville.” When David Duke thanks you for your honesty and courage, something has gone awry.

And then after all this, after fifteen minutes of unprecedented insanity—and you really should watch the whole thing—our president, as he left the podium, said this:

Trump: Thank you all very much. Thank you. Thank you.

Reporter 1: What about the Nazis who support you?

Reporter 2: Do you plan to go to Charlottesville, Mr. President?

Jake Tapper: Good afternoon, and welcome to The Lead, and—wow, that was something else. Oh, he’s still talking, let’s stay listening.

Trump: I own a house in Charlottesville. Does everyone know I own a house in Charlottesville? Oh boy, it’s gonna be—it’s in Charlottesville, you’ll see.

Reporter 2: Is it near the winery or something?

Trump: It’s a—it is the winery. I mean I know a lot about Charlottesville. Charlottesville is a great place that’s been very badly hurt over the last couple of days. I own, I own actually one of the largest wineries in the United States, it’s in Charlottesville.

He can’t resist the plug, he just can’t! “My wine is fantastic, especially the white. There are some very fine bottles.” This is so crazy. You know, everyone’s asking if Trump’s gonna last four years. I’m wondering if any of us are going to last four years. I haven’t screamed at my TV this much since McDreamy died, I mean, really is the last time. The only person who’s happy right now is Sean Spicer, he’s doing backflips wherever the hell he is.

I’ve been thinking about this, and I want to speak to those of you who voted for Donald Trump. And first of all, I want to say I get it, I actually do. You were unhappy with the way things were going, you wanted someone to come in and shake things up, you didn’t want business as usual, nothing ever seems to get done, it’s always the same, these candidates make a lot of promises that go nowhere, it happens over and over again, and you’re sick of it. And so this guy shows up, riding down a golden escalator. He’s not part of the political establishment. In fact, he’s the opposite of that. He’s a billionaire—maybe—he’s written books, he’s not politically correct—he’s not even correct, usually—he talks tough, he wants to drain the swamp, sometimes he can be funny, he rips into his opponents in a way politicians never do, have never done before, and you thought, “You know what? This guy’s different, and that’s what I want: different. Let’s roll the dice, let’s get him in there, have him run the country like a business, cut the dead weight, toughen everyone up. Let’s shake the Etch-A-Sketch hard and start over.”

So you vote for him, you pick him over Jeb Bush and Ted Cruz and John Kasich, and a dozen other Republicans whose names we forgot, and ultimately he beats them. He strolls in, he beats all of these guys, these guys who’ve been in politics forever. And then he beats the ultimate political insider, Hillary Clinton. A woman who’s been running for office—a woman who ran for president of her mother’s uterus in the womb—forever. He beats her. Everyone said he couldn’t, everyone said he wouldn’t, but he did, and it’s exciting, cause this is your guy. You picked a horse at like 35 to one and somehow it paid off.

So now he’s the president. And it starts off ok, he meets with President Obama and they seem to have a nice conversation, then he moves into the White House. Right off the bat, he’s angry at the media for reporting that the crowd at his inauguration was smaller than he thought it was, which was weird, but not important really. And he claimed it stopped raining when he was speaking at his inaugural address, which, everyone could see it was raining, but okay, it was his first week, you give him a break.

So he gets in there, hires his daughter, hires his son-in-law, demands an investigation of voter fraud even though he won the election. He calls the Prime Minister of Australia and hangs up on him. He won’t shake Angela Merkel’s hand. He doesn’t know Frederick Douglass isn’t alive. He claims he can’t release his tax returns ’cause they’re under audit, then says he’s not gonna release them at all. He signs a ban on Muslims that he claims isn’t a ban on Muslims. He compliments the president of the Philippines for murdering drug addicts. Hours after a terror attack in London, he starts a fight with their mayor. After criticizing Obama for playing golf, he plays golf every weekend. He accidentally shares classified intelligence with the Russians. He tweets a typo at midnight, then wakes up and claims it was a secret message. He praises Jim Comey in October, calls him a coward in June, he fires him. He lashes out at his own attorney general for recusing himself from an investigation. He hires the Mooch. He fires the Mooch. He bans the transgendered in the military without telling anyone in the military he’s doing it. He plays chicken with Kim Jong-Un. And that’s just some of the list—if I went through all of it, it’d be longer than the menu at the Cheesecake Factory, it would be huge.

So he is, by every reasonable account, and I’m using his own words here, he is a total disaster. He screws up royally every day, sometimes two or three times a day. We can’t keep up with it. Things come out of nowhere. Every day, there’s something nuts. But you’ve been trying to ignore it, because you don’t want to admit to these smug, annoying liberals that they were right. That’s the last thing you want to do. But the truth is, deep down inside, you know you made a mistake. You know you picked the wrong guy. And it isn’t getting better, it’s getting worse.

So you can do one of two things. You can dig in like Chris Christie at a Hometown Buffet, or you can treat the situation like you’d put Star Wars wallpaper up in the kitchen. “All right, I got caught up, I was excited, I made a mistake. And now it needs to go.”  Well, now he does need to go. So it’s time for, especially you, who voted for him, to tell him to go. Please think about it. He doesn’t even want to be president! He’s miserable! But he won’t resign ’cause his ego is too big, he can’t do it.

So either we impeach him, which could happen, but it might not, or we do what he would do in this situation: We negotiate. We make a deal. And I know this is gonna sound nuts, but I have a deal, so hear me out on this. I think this could solve all our problems. We’re all gonna have to be on board with this.

Instead of president, we make Donald Trump king. OK? We make him the first King of America. Think about it: England has a queen. She lives in a palace. Everyone makes a big deal when she shows up. She has no power at all. In the morning they put a crown on her head, she stands there and waves, she goes back to bed, that’s it. If the queen were to walk out on her balcony and open her shirt, nothing over there would change. The queen could be completely bonkers, it would make no difference at all. She’d still be queen, it would still be fine. That’s what we need to do with Donald Trump: We need to set him up in a castle, maybe in Florida, lead him to the top, and then lock the door to that castle. Forever. Everyone can call him Your Highness. Maybe we give him a scepter that he can hold. He can sit there watching Fox and Friends, maybe chip golf balls out of the window of his tower. There’s no way he turns that deal down, if we tell him he’s going to be the king.

We gotta get creative here, because enough is enough. Desperate times call for desperate measures. And I’m asking you, the people who supported Donald Trump, to step in and help for the good of this country. Mike Pence is ready. He’s boring. He’s relatively sane. He looks like a neighbor you might borrow a lawnmower from—let’s get him in there before it’s too late. Let’s Make America Great Britain Again.

Trump (with a crown Photoshopped on his head): There has never been a greater division, just about, than what we have right now. The hatred, the animosity. I will bring people together. I’m gonna bring people together. You watch. We’re gonna bring people together.

Well, we are watching.

Source: http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2017/0...

Adolf Hitler: 'My patience is now at an end', speech demanding Sudetenland from Czechoslovakia - 1938

26 September 1938, Berlin, Germany

 I have really in these years pursued a practical peace policy. I have approached all apparently impossible problems with the firm resolve to solve them peacefully even when there was the danger of making more or less serious renunciations on Germany’s part. I myself am a front-line soldier and I know how grave a thing war is. I wanted to spare the German people such an evil. Problem after problem I have tackled with the set purpose to make every effort to render possible a peaceful solution.
The most difficult problem which faced me was the relation between Germany and Poland. There was a danger that the conception of a ‘heredity enmity’ might take possession of our people and of the Polish people. That I wanted to prevent.
I know quite well that I should not have succeeded if Poland at that time had had a democratic constitution. For these democracies which are overflowing with phrases about peace are the most bloodthirsty instigators of war. But Poland at that time was governed by no democracy but by a man. In the course of barely a year it was possible to conclude an agreement which, in the first instance for a period of ten years, on principle removed the danger of a conflict. We are all convinced that this agreement will bring with it a permanent pacification. We realize that here are two peoples which must live side by side and that neither of them can destroy the other. A state with a population of thirty-three millions will always strive for an access to the sea. A way to an understanding had therefore to be found ….
‘He will either accept this offer and now at last give to the Germans their freedom, or we will go and fetch this freedom for ourselves.’
And now before us stands the last problem that must be solved and will be solved. It is the last territorial claim which I have to make in Europe, but it is the claim from which I will not recede and which, God willing, I will make good ….
I have only a few statements still to make. I am grateful to Mr Chamberlain for all his efforts. I have assured him that the German people desires nothing else than peace, but I have also told him that I cannot go back behind the limits set to our patience. I have further assured him, and I repeat it here, that when this problem is solved there is for Germany no further territorial problem in Europe.
And I have further assured him that at the moment when Czechoslovakia solves her problems, that means when the Czechs have come to terms with their other minorities, and that peaceably and not through oppression, then I have no further interest in the Czech state. And that is guaranteed to him! We want no Czechs!
But in the same way I desire to state before the German people that with regard to the problem of the Sudeten Germans my patience is now at an end! I have made Mr Benes an offer which is nothing but the carrying into effect of what he himself has promised. The decision now lies in his hands: peace or war. He will either accept this offer and now at last give to the Germans their freedom or we will go and fetch this freedom for ourselves.
On 1 September 1939, Hitler announced to the Reichstag his intention to invade Poland, knowing that this action would bring a declaration of war from Britain and France. In justification, he referred to the terms of the Versailles Treaty and duplicitouslt insisted he had no intention of invading countries to the west of Germany: ‘I have declared that the frontier between France and Germany is a final one.’ Nine rnonths later, German troops had occupied Holland, Belgium and France and Britain was facing the threat of invasion. Even during the war, German industry flourished and productivity increased, helped by slave labour drawn from the occupied territories, including those beyond the ‘western wall’.
I have declared that the frontier between France and Germany is a final one have repeatedly offered friendship and, if necessary, the closest cooperation Britain, but this cannot be offered from one side only. It must find response the other side. Germany has no interests in the West, and our western wall all time the frontier of the Reich on the west. Moreover, we have no aims kind there for the future. With this assurance we are in solemn earnest, and long as others do not violate their neutrality we will likewise take every care to respect it.
‘Germany has no interests in the West, and our western wall is for all· time the frontier of the Reich on the west.’
I am happy particularly to be able to tell you of one event. You know that Russia and Germany are governed by two different doctrines. There was only one question that had to be cleared up. Germany has no intention of exporting its doctrine. Given the fact that Soviet Russia has no intention of exporting its doctrine to Germany, I no longer see any reason why we should still oppose another. On both sides we are clear on that. Any struggle between our people would only be of advantage to others. We have, therefore, resolved to conclude a pact which rules out for ever any use of violence between us. It imposes the obligation on us to consult together in certain European questions. It maker possible for us economic cooperation, and above all it assures that the power both these powerful states are not wasted against one another. Every attend the West to bring about any change in this will fail.
At the same time I should like here to declare that this political decision means a tremendous departure for the future, and that it is a final one. Russia and Germany fought against one another in the World War. That shall and will not happen a second time. In Moscow, too, this pact was greeted exactly as you greet it. I can only endorse word for word the speech of the Russian Foreign Commissar, Molotov.
‘My whole life has been nothing but one long struggle for my people.’
I am determined to solve the Danzig question; the question of the Corridor and to see to it that a change is made in the relationship between Germany and Poland that shall ensure a peaceful co-existence. In this I am resolved to continue to fight until either the present Polish government is willing to bring about this change or until another Polish government is ready to do so. I am resolved to remove from the German frontiers the element of uncertainty, the everlasting atmosphere of conditions resembling civil war. I will see to it that in the East there is, on the frontier, a peace precisely similar to that on our other frontiers.
In this I will take the necessary measures to see that they do not contradict the proposals I have already made known in the Reichstag itself to the rest of the world, that is to say, I will not war against women and children. I have ordered my air force to restrict itself to attacks on military objectives. If, however, the enemy thinks he can from that draw carte blanche on his side to fight by the other methods he will receive an answer that will deprive him of hearing and sight.
This night for the first time Polish regular soldiers fired on our own territory.
Since 5.45 am we have been returning the fire, and from now on bombs will be met with bombs. Whoever fights with poison gas will be fought with poison gas.
Whoever departs from the rules of humane warfare can only expect that we shall do the same. I will continue this struggle, no matter against whom, until the safety of the Reich and its rights are secured.
For six years now I have been working on the building up of the German defences.
Over 90 milliards have in that time been spent on the building up of these defence forces. They are now the best equipped and are above all comparison with what they were in 1914. My trust in them is unshakeable. When I called up these forces and when I now ask sacrifices of the German people and if necessary every sacrifice, then I have a right to do so, for I also am today absolutely ready, just as we were formerly, to make every personal sacrifice.
‘A November 19 18 will never be repeated In German history.’
I am asking of no German man more than I myself was ready throughout four years at any time to do. There will be no hardships for Germans to which I myself will not submit. My whole life henceforth belongs more than ever to my people.
I am from now on just first soldier of the German Reich. I have once more put on that coat that was the most sacred and dear to me. I will not take it off again until victory is secured, or I will not survive the outcome.
As a National Socialist and as a German soldier I enter upon this struggle with a stout heart. My whole life has been nothing but one long struggle for my people, for its restoration, and for Germany. There was only one watchword for that struggle: faith in this people. One word I have never learned: that is, surrender.
If, however, anyone thinks that we are facing a hard time, I should ask him to remember that once a Prussian king, with a ridiculously small state, opposed a stronger coalition, and in three wars finally came out successful because that state had that stout heart that we need in these times. I would, therefore, like to assure all the world that a November 1918 will never be repeated in German history. Just as I myself am ready at any time to stake my life – anyone can take it for my people and for Germany – so I ask the same of all others.
Whoever, however, thinks he can oppose this national command, whether directly or indirectly, shall fall. We have nothing to do with traitors. We are all faithful to our old principle. It is quite unimportant whether we ourselves live, but it is essential that our people shall live, that Germany shall live. The sacrifice that is demanded of us is not greater than the sacrifice that many generations have made. If we form a community closely bound together by vows, ready for anything, resolved never to surrender, then our will will master every hardship and difficulty. And I would like to close with the declaration that lance made when I began the struggle for power in the Reich. I then said: ‘If our will is so strong that no hardship and suffering can subdue it, then our will and our German might shall prevail.’

Source: http://www.thetidenewsonline.com/2014/05/2...